Honestly,
there were times when I thought that I was ready to be a wife simply because I
was desperate to get out of my comfort zone and be like the other girls who
have done many things on their own just to have a happy life, and having
thoughts like “If I ever get married, then maybe my mother would stop worrying
about me so much and let me live my own life without her discouraging me just because
I’m her only daughter.” I have to admit, I was naïve and didn’t have no idea
what I was thinking because I didn’t really understood myself.
For a while, I realize that I
have plenty of time to find a husband other than just being lonely at times. I
mean, as I look at married couples who lasted more than a year that gives me
the heads up on what all I have to experience when my time comes to be a wife to
my future husband. It’s true that I am young but still I need a little more
time to prepare myself because that’s what God’s timing for: it’s for me to
work on myself. If I don’t learn how to be alone enough to work on myself, I
don’t know how I’ll be able to handle any marriage or relationship.
Many say that I’m way too
beautiful to be single and not have a husband. But I have to remind myself every
day that I'm not single and I'm not taken. I'm simply on reserve for the one who
deserves my heart because they say good things take time. I even prayed and
asked God to prepare me to be a good Proverbs 31 Woman as He prepares me with a
Job 29 Man, which means its best that I pray and make a vow not to be the woman
who needs a man. But to be the woman a man needs.
I have my crushes on a few guys
but it’s important for me to go by a guy’s heart instead of his looks, voice,
and smile. Why? Because it takes an intelligent man to open my mind, a handsome
man to open my eyes, a gentleman to open my heart and a Job 29 Man to treat and
remind me that I am worth more than rubies. In the meantime, I know my Boaz or
my Job 29 Man is looking for me but he have to seek God earnestly to find me because
I am hidden so deeply in HIS heart so all I have to do now is just have faith
and be patient. As much as I want a God-fearing husband, I have to make sure I
am virtuous enough to endure the marriage process. But as of right now, I am
not fully prepared for it because I still need a little more time to pray and
focus on becoming a better woman.
God
knows what He’s doing so I am going to continue trust Him with my
impossibilities while I’m working on the possibilities.
God
is Love,
Wykeshia
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